PLANNING THE WEDDING

I just got engaged! Now how do I start planning my wedding? Well these are the questions that arise in your mind. Follow a few steps that will help you towards your wedding day!!!

Imagine your perfect wedding
Before you announce to the entire world that you are engaged and everyone assumes that they are invited to your wedding, we suggest that you sit down with your finance and discuss the date, time, size, formality and the style of the wedding arrangements that really reflect your taste as a couple.

Planning the wedding ceremony
The ceremony is the most special part of your entire wedding. It is time for the couple to meet the clergy member/priest who will perform your wedding. The ceremony is the most important moment when the couple vows before the church, making marriage a holy institution before all the attendants and family.

Setting the date for the wedding
After the engagement, the parents and the couple have to decide on a date and contact the church and reception venue and reserve the places in advance. The couple have to keep in mind the season and the day they prefer to marry or a day which is special to them. Do select another date as backup in case the church or the venue is not available on the day you wish to get married.

Select your date
Decide what time of the year you want to get married and select two tentative wedding dates. It's better to have a backup in case your fist choice is not available. Don't forget to check the calendar to make sure it's not a holiday or an event on the desired wedding day.

Choose your ceremony and reception location
Let your imagination run wild when selecting a wedding location, but remember the best spot may be one that is nearby and can accommodate your guest count. You'll want to find out how many events each site hosts per day and whether there are hidden fees and charges.

Making your ceremony unique
There are a number of elements you can add to your ceremony to personalise it.
Following are some suggestions:
Using an unconventional vow or writing your own would create special magic in the ceremony.
Incorporating a family reading sequence that would give the ceremony a more personal touch.
Thank you notes to your parents is the perfect opportunity to honour them publicly.
Using candles and flowers as a sign of unity would make the ceremony more family bound.
Making up your wedding programme where detailing of bride / groom / attendants time of ceremony etc. is done.

Planning the ceremony in church
The details of the wedding ceremony are planned in conjunction with a priest.
If you wish to write your own vows or to include a special passage in the service, it must be planned and approved in advance.
If you like a choir or instrumentalist to play during the service, that must be arranged.
A tentative date or approximate time for the wedding should be set by the couple.
Fixing an appointment with a minister a week in advance should be done for last minutes detailing.
Make sure of the duration of the ceremony.
If a second minister will be participating, arrangements should be made.
Permission should be taken for floral arrangements and decorations.
Check if there is a room for dressing prior to the service if you require one.
Check if rose petals / confetti etc. are permitted to be thrown outside the building.
Check if an aisle carpet will be provided , if you want one .
Check if space is provided for car parking during the ceremony.
Check if there are restrictions on your dress or your brides maids ensembles example s (sleeves/necklines /length etc.)
Check the payment to be made for the of the priest and the use of the church.
Make sure that the church is available in perfect condition.

The ceremony consist s of the following :

The Roman Catholic nuptial mass.
Introductary rites.
Entrance hymns.
Priest welcomes the congregation.
Penitential rites.
Opening prayer.
Liturgy of the word.
First reading.
Responsorial psalm .
Second reading.
Alleluia.
Gospel reading.
Homily.
Rites of marriage.
Declaration of consen t.
Blessing of the rings.
General intercession.
Prayer of the faithful.
Profession of faith.
Liturgy of the Eucharist .
Offertory song / prayer.
Invitation to prayer.
Prayer over the gifts.
Eucharistic prayer.
Introductory dialogue.
Preface of marriage.
Holy H oly.
Eucharistic prayer.
Communion rite.
The Lord's prayer.
Nuptial blessing.
Sign of peace.
Breaking of the bread.
Communion.
After communion.
Communion antiphon.
Silence after communion.
Prayer after communion.
Blessing.
Dismissal.
Registration of marriage.

A nuptial mass is permitted if both couples are Catholic.

Suggested scripture readings for the wedding ceremony
Your officiate will be able to help you select appropriate scripture readings for your ceremony. Below are some suggested readings that are commonly chosen for marriage ceremonies :

Old testament

Genesis 1:26-28
Genesis 2 :18-24
Psalm 33
Psalm 100
Psalm 103
Psalm 128:1-4
Jeremiah 31:31-34
Ruth 1:16-17
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

New Testament

Romans 8:31-39
Colossians 3:12-17
Ephesians 5:25-32
Matthew 5:1-12
Matthew 22:35-40
Mark 10:6-9
John 2:1-11
John15:12-17
1John 4:7-12

Marriage in a Catholic C hurch
The couple has to get themselves registered in church soon after the engagement and reserve the date for the wedding. The priest will celebrate the wedding . I f the couple would like their relative to celebrate, they will have to give a NOC (no objection certificate) from the church.

The following documents are required :
Recent baptism certificate.
Pre-nuptial certificate.
Civil registration certificate, if done.
The couple will have to fill a NOC from their parishes.

The publication of the banns.
The wedding banns are read in church for general public information. If there may be a need for objection towards the wedding it should be carried before other church procedures.

Pre-nuptial courses.
The pre-nuptial courses are carried out in church for the enrichment of married life. It's a three to one day course in which the couple has to take part in sharing and understanding and rooting themselves to marriage. This course helps the couple to learn more about each other and the institution of marriage.

Marriage between non-Catholics and C atholics.
If either member of the marrying couple is of another caste , they may have to carry out the legal procedures strictly.

The following document s are required if a member of the couple is non-Catholic :
Civil marriage certificate.
Pre-marriage course s certificate.
Birth certificate.
Oath of Free State certificate.
Declaration of NOC to children being baptised.
Dispensation from impediment (disparity of cult).
Affidavit (marrying freely).
Sworn testimony of the witness.

Marriage between Protestant and Catholic :
The following document s are required if one of the couple is a Protestant:
Baptism certificate.
Pre-nuptial certificate.
Affidavit.
Oath of Free State.
Sworn testimony of witness.
Dispensation from impediment (mix religion).
Declaration NOC.

Registration
Registration of m arriages in India is compul sory . Registration of a civil recitation of marriage in India is accepted as evidence of the marriage. Like birth and death, marriages also have to be registered to create legal right. Civil registration is carried out for legal procedures of state government. The couple desiring to marry should have civil registration done which requires local residence certificate or the evidence of birth certificate.

Birth certificate
The first requirement for your registration is your birth certificate presented by both boy and girl. If the birth was not registered, a lengthy procedure has to be followed where you will have to secure a registration certificate from a civil registration office that your birth is not registered and visit the registration office with an affidavit and your actual birth date to obtain the birth certificate.

Domicile certificate (residence certificate)
This certificate is obtained from registration office stating that you reside in that area.
At least one of the parties must produce the domicile certificate.
The law of marriage is a civil contract solemnised between two people of different sex with the purpose of legitimately constituting a family.
Civil registration is carried out before or after the church marriage.
It needs 20 25 days of registration and four witnesses.

Court marriage
Court marriages can be done within a day or week. The court permits marriage only in urgent cases of pregnancy or in case the couple is planning to settle abroad and needs the marriage certificate to initiate those proceedings.

Court marriage is required if one is marrying a person from another state or country.
If the girl/boy is below age , the parents ' or guardians ' signature is required. (Is this legal?)
Court marriage is carried out by the APP (the A ssistant of P ublic P rosecutor).
If the girl is marrying a non-catholic , then the church letter is not required.

Ceremony music
There is essentially four segments at the church.
The period when the guests begin to enter the church to seat themselves and the recessional while leaving the church.
Permission must be taken from priests about the kind of music played in church.
The ceremony music must be more soft and melodies.
There could be a choir or just instruments depending on your choice.